The Best Bad Boy (Chapter Eleven)

That night searching through a swirling mist ridden darkness, crying out his name, fear wrapped icy hands around my heart.

Waking, uneasiness churned and the temptation to call, see if he was okay nearly overwhelmed me. Instead of embarrassing myself though, I was quick to get to school.

Bare hallways had yet to come alive. A few students haunted the commons, the sound of their footsteps echoed. Each pretended the others didn't exist. A baffling behavior. Humans, social creatures, meant being alone in high school flashed a neon sign of 'There is something wrong with you,' in giant letters over your head.

The lack of exchanged pleasantries and avoidance of eye contact would have been humorous if it weren't so sad. Afraid to say, "Hi," afraid of rejection or of stepping outside the lines, I smiled at each of them and watched as one by one they scampered away as though my smile were anthrax. 

A bus arrived. The loners looked up, hoping for friends or at least some acquaintance that offered a bit of protection from the crowd. Only a few didn't find someone to greet.

I pulled a book out of my bag. No one would be arriving in my circle of friends for at least a half hour. Losing myself in a novel was usually easy but today the future intruded.

Lachelle was going to become a great artist or graphic designer. The image of her in a café sipping foam from a creamy espresso made me smile.

Debbie wanted to be a vampire, but I anticipated she would be the next Anne Rice. She lived in a world all her own.

It seemed everyone had a direction, except me. Maybe I would figure it out in college but which one? 

Different schools, different programs. At USU, I could qualify to search out new species in a rainforest as a Zoologist or dive with dolphins as a marine biologist.

Going into any field of biology would be a dream but what about exploring space? Or acting? Getting paid to kiss a lot of hot guys that would be the ultimate career and getting to be someone new over and over exploring a thousand different lives and stories that would be incredible but the chances of succeeding as an actress were slim to none. 

"Get a day job," everyone said whenever I mentioned that particular goal. "Something to pay the bills." Even my dad didn't see any potential for me in the field. My dad, a dreamer, encouraged me in everything, everything but that.  

My sisters thought I should go to a college for massage therapy, but when I thought about it, it felt like walking into a tiny box and spending the rest of my life suffocating all other possibilities.

What did Lee want in life? What were his dreams? He was too smart to stay in this town where truck driving and roughnecking for the oilfield were the only options.

Only options for men anyway, for women there were two very different options. Cut hair and be a stay at home mom or just be a stay at home mom who doesn't cut hair. The idea of cutting hair for a living made me gag. As for motherhood, the idea made me queasy but everyone expected me to change my mind and what did I know? I was only sixteen. 

Computer sciences were the fastest growing fields but the idea of spending my life working with soulless machines made my teeth grind. 

Determined to ignore the problem for a little longer I dived into the pages of my book. 

A few chapters later Chelle arrived. Her smile a bit small and her body language a bit off, I tried to sense what was wrong. Usually, it was easy enough to guess. Today though she was deliberately hiding something.

Had her dad gone on another bender? Was her mom back on the wishing Chelle was never born train? She avoided my eyes. Chelle looking at her feet was the usual but today she avoided even directing her face toward me.

When Debbie showed up, there was a short boyish looking girl with her. "Hey Thing One and Thing Two, this is my new sis, Jimmi."

Jimmi shook hands with hard fast jerks. My instincts screamed not to trust her. There was something sly and calculating in her eyes.

The nightmare squeezed tighter and tighter as classes dragged by slow and tortuous. It was a boa constrictor and I was the prey.

Normally, I trailed behind, amongst the last students to leave. The shoving and competition to be out the door a few seconds faster, a bit ridiculous. Only today urgency hummed in every muscle. When the final bell rang, everything was packed and I jumped out of my seat, the second person out the door.

Through the halls, my feet raced and my eyes searched for a familiar black leather trench coat.