Ashley Needles

Love was stupid. Love was a delusion of deranged people, used to excuse the most heinous behaviors. Besides even if love did exist, Lee would never love someone as silly and plain as I was. I was a blank slate. My only flair was my hips. "Ignore the mess, it's just where we hide the bodies." Chelle's eyes danced with wit. To her, her home wasn't a can of sewage spoiling in the sun, it was normal. She was comfortable. Lee chuckled and Chelle emerged from her cocoon gleaming. "What do you like to do for fun?" Lee's hand stroked the curve of my side, his fingers dipped into the waist of my pants. 'Sex,' his body stated but his lips said, "Read mostly." Lee's eyes caressed my face, neck, and traveled down to my pelvis. What exactly did he mean by that? Was I an open book to him? We still hadn't talked about Senecca, about the rumors. "What do you like to read?" Even as I asked, Chelle's eyes narrowed...

It hits like a ton of bricks. Twelve years and I still can't bear the pain. I miss your laugh. I miss your three A.M. phone calls. I miss your drunken rants. I miss the way you smoked though I hated it because I worried it would kill you. I couldn't stand the thought of losing you. I still can't. Three days a year I want to die. For three days I would give up everything to be with you. Then I move on again until next year. I bury the pain and agony in living. I remember the moment our eyes met. You were playing guitar, performing, singing as I walked into Steamers Café. Our eyes met instantly. You looked over and I looked up. In your eyes, I saw the awe. You made me feel beautiful from that first moment. I went to Kurray and ordered. I danced to your music, flirting with every guy in the place. I was only meant to stop by but I liked your music, and I loved the way your eyes watched me as I danced to it. When you finished your set you approached. "I'm going o...

This morning I woke up with some ab definition and tone, excited I promptly blasted some music and began working out. After an hour of intense cardio, I went back to the mirror. I hadn't eaten anything but all definition had disappeared and my stomach looked like I'd just finished eating Thanksgiving dinner. What the hell? I wanted to scream but was too busy burping. Yes, that's right burping. Gross right? The sodium bloat. The body pumping adrenaline and cortisol into my abs and organs causing water retention and digestive "issues" aka burping. This should go away in a couple weeks but how long before my abs go back to looking cut and not pregnant? For me, this stage lasts longer than most people. Most people get away with a two week adjustment period, me, however, it lasts usually about two months. Because of things that happened in a certain relationship let's just say this bloating phase made me afraid of exercising. When someone is counti...

I just read some dating tips and wow did some of those tips make me want to barf. I mean I guess bringing up reality tv shows might work if the only type of women you want to date are shallow drama queens. But if you are looking for a woman with a bit more class, try these out.  Note: these are tips for after you've gotten her to agree to go out with you! First, be clear in communicating when and where you want to see her and that YOU WANT TO SEE HER!!!! Feeling wanted is a basic human need. Feeling needed is a burden. Be okay if she has other stuff to do. Second, keep your word. Be a little early or on time but don't be late. Women crave security. If you're not there then it gives the impression you could disappear at any moment in the future and it makes it hard to trust what you say from there forward. Third, Be Attentive. This is a big one. There is no greater aphrodisiac than a man's laser-focused attention to what a woman is saying and thinking. Add...

Lee played with my hair. My skin tingled. There was something in his posture that was protective and in his eyes a question. Should I have kissed him? "We were heading to Chelle's house." I left it open. I didn't want Lee to see where Chelle lived but disinviting him wouldn't have been kind either. We could go to the library but would Lee be comfortable there? What other places were there? Chelle didn't wait. "Want to come?" She piped in. "Sure," Lee said, his soft gaze wrapping me in a warm blanket. Too quickly the emotional security disappeared. Even with Lee's hand holding mine, with each step closer to the dump Chelle called home I cringed a little more. What would Lee think of the rickety steps, the cheap trailer, the mountains of moldy dishes, the overwhelming stench of cat urine and old cigarettes? His apartment was bare of clutter and I didn't know if it was because he was fastidious or because he had little to c...

Bikini or lingerie I've made and helped make other's money. Tonight it dawned on me I should be the one taking advantage of my looks. What if I did a boudoir shoot for my books? In my author pages instead of just blurbing, why not add some titillating photos? I'm already starting to get "cut" again. (Unfortunately, writing is terrible exercise, so I had about ten pounds to lose.) For Valentine's, I bought myself some rollerblades to build up my gluteus maximus. Rollerblading is great for core and ass, mostly ass! Lately, curvy butts are the in 'thing' and I've never had much of one. Time to find out if it is even possible by falling flat on my face a few times!    Lacking the balance for things like skateboarding or even riding a bicycle, since an accident when I was a wee brat that also gave me a slight concussion and temporary memory loss, I haven't been "sporty" but it's one of those things I kind of always want...