Narcissism, Addiction, Delusions

Here's what I've learned over the last few years from trying to make things make sense again.

Often addicts are trying to fill up a hole in their "soul." They try to fill it with food or drugs or exercise or other people. This need can create both good or bad habits. It can lead to greatness or destruction. Sometimes both. It's an interesting paradigm.

Narcissists are also typically addicts. They are addicted to praise and feeling special. The reason is usually the narcissist feels incredibly lonely and is in deep pain. Like drug addicts, they will do just about anything to get their fix. Hurt loved ones, lie, have affairs, make millions, whatever it takes.

This is why narcissists often turn to drugs or create delusions of grandeur.

The most difficult time for a narcissist or a drug addict is the comedown, the crash. This is when the narcissist is most vulnerable to psychotic breaks or picking up new addictions.

The desperate need to feel special will often cause the narcissist to create delusions. These delusions depict the narcissist as extraordinary in some way. They are a messenger of God, they have super powers, they can heal people, they are prophets, they are superheroes who can save the world, the list is endless.

This is the defining characteristic of narcissists, they are somehow better than those around them. They have secret knowledge or are more capable than anyone else.

They believe this way for the payoff of feeling superior. The downside of this though is it adds another separation between them and the rest of the world increasing their loneliness and pain. However, instead of seeing the real cause of their pain, they blame everyone else.

Unfortunately, one of the worst things you can do for a narcissist at this time is give them empathy and pity. This will only reinforce the belief that everything wrong in their life is someone else's fault.

Treating narcissism is a long process and not something that can be cured overnight. It requires professional help and most psychologists are unqualified to treat it because narcissists have the ability to adapt and hide their narcissism. They are often intensely charming and seemingly wonderful people. The only way for a mental health professional to be able to treat narcissism is to first be able to diagnose it.

Narcissists though have a reason for everything wrong in their life whether that reason is real or something they made up is irrelevant to them. The most important thing to the narcissist is looking good and being admired.

This often comes at the cost of intimacy. Narcissists hide their true selves in order to give off the persona of someone they view as loveable which leads to them never truly feeling loved.

So how can we support narcissists in overcoming their addictions and narcissism?

Well, that's a tough one and I'm still trying to figure it out. It is possible for a person to be cured of narcissism, but first, they have to want it.

And while I've learned some things many of these things conflict so I'm just going to say watch some youtube videos on it or read some books or ask the professionals. IDK, your choice!

Just remember to take care of yourself first. Mental disorders can be extremely draining to deal with and no matter how much you may want to you cannot heal a narcissist all by yourself. The hole inside is mostly self-inflicted and must be mostly self-healed.