Kill the Cat (Dating Advice for Men)

Dating I've noticed one giant mistake guy after guy keeps making.

On dates, I try to find things to compliment and questions to ask. Isn't that what makes a great date? Guys, however, seem to think dating is a chance to brag about their accomplishments and give shallow compliments about the way a girl looks.

"Waitress, check and a barf bucket, please."

I guess I'm not your average Jane. Is it so wrong to want a guy to give a damn about my accomplishments? I mean, I work my ass off too!

I get it's intimidating for guys to date a woman who's traveled a ton, been successful in several industries by the time she was thirty and has huge aspirations but guys seldom even get to finding that stuff out, as they talk about what great employees they are and how awesome their new sports car or truck is.

To be fair there is one question that sometimes comes up if a guy has a bit more of a clue than the average bear, "What sports team do you like?"

I never say what I really want to say to that which is, "Um, 'dude,' I'd rather pluck my eyeballs out with a spork than watch or talk about sports. That would at least be interesting and unpredictable."

Questions that would make me hot for a guy but the men I've dated lately seem completely incompetent of asking, "What are you most proud of?" "What is important to you?" "What do you like about your job?" "Where do you see yourself in a year?" "What kind of books do you like to read?"

Instead, when guys on the off chance do ask probing questions, the questions are usually thinly veiled attempts to turn me into some sort of plastic barbie doll with puppet strings included. "Are you sure you don't want kids?" "Don't you think you will change your mind about having kids?" etc, etc, etc.

I'm thirty-four I have a sneaky suspicion I know exactly who I am and what I want or at least an awareness of what I don't know about myself yet.

Those questions make me gag, hard and while I do my best to control the need to vomit, things continue downhill.

Once a guy feels he has sufficiently told me how "hot" I am, he starts pawing and if I remove his hands from one area, he gropes for another. When I say don't touch my ass, that doesn't mean grab my tits and squeeze like they're the horns on the bike you rode as a kid.

I know this is a bitter rant, but I really am trying to help all you guys out there have a little bit more success with women.

So now that we've got the celery out of the way let's get to dessert. There are a hundred things I love about men.

I love the way men smell after working in the sun without cologne.

I love how ambitious some guys are. (It's ridiculous the amount of pressure you guys are under to succeed but for me, it's really just about being with someone who has a dream)

I love those rare guys who support my ambitions. (Men, if you've read my book that is a definite A+ in this category)

I love men who have unique interests and can introduce me to new things.

I love it when men do the dishes or clean. (I hate cleaning so this is a super turn on)

I love the way men can eat. (If I cook for a guy and he doesn't pack it away it's always a bit of disappointment.)

I love how hard guys can massage. Those shoulder rubs, YUM!!!!

I love how much heat you guys give off!!! Baby, it's cold outside!

I love it when guys are smart and have well thought out opinions!

I love men who are feminists. I get I'm not able to do everything a guy does, but just a guy who supports my right to try, that's damn SEXY!

I love men who own their emotions. A guy who can calmly say "I feel ...." so rare and so completely satisfying. (The keys being calm and owning not blaming) Men, yes I want you to feel and I'm not alone!

So thank you men! Thanks for reading, listening and taking the time to hear me out!!!

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